Lately,
I’ve started thinking,
“I’d like to try living as someone who writes books.”
It wasn’t a sudden realization.
Looking back,
I think it was something I had quietly admired
for a very long time.
People who write while living their everyday lives.
I think I’ve always been drawn to that kind of life.
(Though honestly,
the part I love most might simply be
“working from home at my own pace.”)
While we were talking about it,
Moriyan casually said,
“Maybe I should try finding
something I truly want to do, too.”
A little while ago,
we each tried listing words
that felt important to us.
For me,
those words eventually formed
something like a pyramid of values.
First comes freedom and spaciousness.
Because of that,
I can be honest with myself.
From honesty,
curiosity begins to grow.
And at the end of that flow,
there is peace.
That was the order I found.
Moriyan, on the other hand,
listed around ten different words.
Honesty.
Sincerity.
Humility.
Perseverance.
Frugality.
Discipline.
Confidence.
Passion.
At the time,
he couldn’t remember the last few.
But later he recalled them:
Courage.
Growth through effort.
Compassion.
Unlike mine,
his words didn’t seem to have an order yet.
They felt as though
they were still quietly floating in the air.
But somehow,
I found myself thinking this:
Maybe the foundation beneath all of Moriyan’s values
is confidence.
Moriyan often says
he lacks confidence.
Maybe certain experiences in his life
made him feel that way.
But honestly,
I don’t see him that way at all.
Because someone who is honest,
sincere,
humble,
constantly learning,
and compassionate—
I don’t think that kind of person
could truly be empty inside.
Ways of being like that
can only stand on top of
a very strong foundation.
When I told Moriyan this,
he thought quietly for a moment and said,
“Then I just need to build confidence.”
But somehow,
that wording didn’t feel quite right to me.
Is confidence really something
we “gain” afterward?
I think it may be the opposite.
I think confidence is something
that already exists inside us.
Life simply makes it shake.
We become anxious.
We lose our way.
We start doubting ourselves.
But then we return.
When we waver,
we return.
When we waver,
we return again.
And by repeating that process,
we slowly strengthen
the foundation within ourselves.
In a way,
it feels very similar
to taking care of the body.
Posture,
breathing—
we can’t maintain perfect alignment forever.
Of course we collapse sometimes.
Of course we get tired.
But if we know
where our center is,
we can always return to it.
Confidence might be the same.
I believe Moriyan is someone
who will accomplish many things
through passion and courage.
He’s not the kind of person
who shows off what he can do.
But he naturally earns trust.
Quietly.
Steadily.
And whatever he gains,
I think he’ll gently give back to others.
When I picture him,
I see someone like
a kind and gentle leader.
Of course,
this is only a vision of the future.
There’s no need
to decide everything right now.
But lately,
I’ve been thinking this:
Maybe the things we truly want to do
don’t suddenly fall from the sky one day.
Maybe they already exist quietly inside us.
The small moments of:
“That feels nice.”
“I like that.”
“I kind of want to try it.”
Those feelings
have probably been there all along.
One day,
we simply notice them.
And I think
the same is true for Moriyan.
I think it’s already there inside him too.
Quietly waiting.
November 20, 2026