People often tell me,
“You’re always smiling.”
And honestly, I think that’s true.
But I don’t see myself as such a simple person.
Sometimes my smile is genuine.
Sometimes it isn’t.
There are moments when I feel a little hurt or stubborn and think,
“Fine then.”
I can be judgmental.
I can be selfish.
I can even be a little cunning.
And when I notice those parts of myself, I sometimes feel disappointed.
Why would I think something like that?
A few days ago, I felt that way while visiting one of my clients.
As I listened to them speak, a thought briefly crossed my mind:
“What happened in their life that made them so angry?”
But I set that thought aside and simply listened.
On my way home, another thought appeared.
“I’m glad I was the one who visited today.”
Then another.
“I handled that pretty well.”
And even,
“I’m not sure everyone else could have responded the same way.”
For a moment, I felt proud of myself.
And then I immediately thought,
“Well… that’s rather arrogant, isn’t it?”
Human beings are busy.
Our minds are constantly moving from one thought to the next.
Around that time, I picked up an essay by Momoko Sakura for the first time in a while.
I’ve loved Chibi Maruko-chan and Coji-Coji ever since I was a child.
Reading her work again as an adult, I found myself thinking:
Maybe it’s perfectly fine for one person to have many different sides.
Some days we are calm.
Some days we are mean.
Some days we are admirable.
Some days we are embarrassing.
The characters in her stories are like that too.
Even the people who seem annoying at first somehow become lovable before long.
It’s strange.
People are all a little odd.
A little mean.
A little kind.
A little pathetic.
Maybe that’s what makes us fascinating.
My clients.
The people I work with.
Moriyan.
And me.
None of us are completely good or completely bad.
We’re a little complicated.
A little clumsy.
And somehow, deeply lovable.
And yet, we share the same classrooms.
We live in the same towns.
We sit together and drink the same tea.
I think the warmth that lingers after reading Momoko Sakura’s writing comes from that understanding.
That human beings are imperfect.
And that somehow makes them worth loving.
People really are fascinating.
At least, I think so.